Figure out what you’re scared of and do it as soon as possible!

Posted by Bernie Reifkind on January 17, 2011

Is this great advice or what?  To stare down the sun, to face your most grimacing challenge head on or possibly to just let go of something.

How much emotional freedom would you be creating for yourself?

How much room would you be creating for good things to enter your life?

Facing a bully, even if you get beat up, sends a blatant message that next time you will not back down to being bullied.  You might get a little hurt physically but emotionally you gain a strength that you never knew you had.

And who hasn’t been bullied?  In the workplace bullying is all to alarmingly common.

What stops us from doing what we are scared to do?  Fear of some sort.  Pain of another.  Maybe we procrastinate in the hope that something will just go away.

It seldom does.

We are born fearless.  As infants we communicate every need that we have.  Hopefully are needs are met.

We learn fear as we age.  We learn rejection.  We learn to avoid the pain.

Sometimes avoiding the pain only means that we prolong the pain.  When we do so, we are only putting off the inevitable and sometimes this creates even greater pain on an emotional level.

Why not fire an ineffective employee?  Why not ask for a raise?   Why not fire a client that causes us more grief than value? Why not make a cold call? Why not confront anything we fear?

So what are the benefits of immediately doing what we are afraid to do?

1.  We learn the truth about a situation that may not even be real.  For example how many times do we avoid initiating a phone call because we believe someone is upset with us? Many times we find out that the opposite is true. Facing what appears to be a threat, may turn out to be something to your advantage.  We just might learn how wrong we are.  That might be the real truth.  Could anything be more emotionally freeing?

2.  We increase our own self esteem. When we confront our fear and find out just how strong we really are, we feel better about ourselves, for the next time. We grow more confidant about ourselves and this just might open other doors that we never felt that we could enter.

3.  We begin to better understand ourselves. Why were we afraid?  What did we think might happen and what did we invent as a consequence?  Maybe something similar in our past triggers an old fear, but you know what?  Things change.  You’re not the same person that you were years ago or possibly yesterday.

4. Wisdom. This might be the most important element in facing down our fears.  Contemplate the stuff in your life that never really happened. “It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is nothing if the audience is deaf.” -Walter Lippman.

Mark Twain is reputed to have said ” I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

So,  do what you’re most scared of as soon as possible and free yourself so that you can create a better life for not only yourself, but for those around you.

I am Bernie Reifkind, CEO and founder of Premier Search, Inc. I can be reached at 1(800) 801-1400 or email at  I welcome your phone call.

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